Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Big Brother After Dark Recap August 3, 2011

Most of the house guests are in the back yard getting ready for the wedding.

Shelly Moore wants to play Simon Says she says she is very good at calling that. She said she may not be good at a lot of things but she is good at that.

Shelly has made Brendon Villegas a tuxedo out of black trash bags with a foil stripe down the front of each side and a pink flower. She is now attaching the flower. It is actually very good for being made out of trash bags. It also has two bottle cap buttons. It is a sleeveless tuxedo; he will wear no shirt and a black tie.

Rachel Reilly is in the bathroom putting on her makeup. The wedding is scheduled to start at 10pm.

Everyone keeps getting called into the DR.

The houseguest's got champagne for after the wedding, but Brendon can’t have any because he is a have not. Adam Poch is the elf ring bearer. Jeff Schroeder is the best man.

Porsche Briggs is making caramel popcorn, touching each piece to pick the kernels out, because they can’t figure out how to get the microwave to pop the whole bag.

Jeff Schroeder just woke up. I haven’t seen Jordan Lloyd or Daniele Donato they may be up in the HOH. Rachel is looking for something to wear under her dress. Shelly told her that would be classy because then you couldn’t see through the dress, which is made of white plastic trash bags. She has a foil garter with a bow.

Adam Poch and Lawon Exum are outside on the couch saying they have to win HOH this week otherwise they are just playing their game. It’s their show. Lawon, I want this to be our show, not their show. Adam, we lucked out with Dick leaving and them turning on themselves.

The wedding has been pushed back to 10:30 pm so everyone can shower first. Jordan is out on the couch.

They cannot sing the wedding march. They can only sing For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow. Lawon is not allowed to say whatever it was he wanted to say.

Lawon Exum says he wants to be a host, but every time he hosts a game or something he messes up. He is the preacher so at least that should be interesting. Daniele is going to blow bubbles going down the aisle.

They told Jeff he couldn’t have a beer until after the wedding. He has now decided nobody is the boss of him he is having a beer.

Rachel Reilly has decided not to wear a dress under her trash bag dress. She has a swimsuit on. Daniele is not happy she is in a dress for the second time this week. I don't blame her.

Kalia Booker is helping Rachel Reilly get her wedding gown on.

Jeff Schroeder is wearing a blue sport jacket and a fedora. Very cool looking, kind of a retro 70’s look.

Kalia is having trouble getting the crown to fit on Rachel’s head. The crown goes straight across, it is not round. It worked yesterday, today it is not cooperating. Rachel says she doesn’t want to look silly as she stands there in a dress made of trash bags.

Brendon decided to wear his black tank top even though Rachel told him not too.

The wedding begins. Daniele goes first with her bubble wand, then Kalia, Adam the elf, then Jordan, Porsche, Shelly comes out and hollers “introducing the bride”. They sing For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow as Rachel walks down the aisle.

Lawon, Is screaming like James Brown or someone. Welcome, I said welcome to the back yard hammock epileptic church. We are gathered here today for Brendon and Rachel in Big Brother Matrimony. Who gives this bride away today. Jordan, I do. The message today is love. Why love? Because love should be everywhere in the Big Brother house. The love has brought you two together. One plus one equals two. So I ask of you what brought you here is love and the people that are here. ?? That's what he said. So roses are red, violets are blue, guess what Big Brother the congregation loves you. I guess Lawon forgot his lines Shelly is whispering to him what to do next.

Lawon, Rachel do you love and respect Brendon? Rachel, I do. Lawon, Brendon do you love and respect Rachel. Lawon’s sing song screaming voice is very annoying, but the house guest's are laughing at him, so he is just doing it more and more. He tells Rachel to do her vows.

Rachel, well Brendon we met it all started last summer, when we were on the block. I never, I knew from the first time that I gave you a look. She turns around and looks at someone and says I don’t know why I’m nervous. It all started last summer when we were on the block. I knew from the first time that our eyes locked. We bonded over our love for science. Who knew we would be making a lifelong alliance. I promise I will always be loving and kind. And you know that I am always going to definitely speak my mind. I know that you are very understanding you spell it all the time and you even appreciate this cheesy little rhyme. She forgets her lines again. We have a lot of fun and there is always a lot of laughs even when slop gives you a lots of gas. I thought it was so special when you used the veto on me, almost as special as when you got down on one knee. I promise to always put your key first and for me I hope you always have a thurst. Gross! I will always be your number one fan. Because as I always say no one comes between me and my man.

Lawon, I said now, Brendon do your vows.

Brendon, Rachel since the first time I sat next to you in that nomination chair, and kissed you that first night in the hammock over there. I knew that you were the one for me. I promise to always use the POV on you. I promise never to evict you and I will promise to always talk with you before I nominate anyone from Big Brother. I love and adore you, you are my best friend and soul mate. Rachel interrupts, it has to be funny. I wonder if she just realized she didn’t’ tell him she loves him. Brendon, I promise to always put your key before mine. You're everything to me and I also know undoubtedly our love will be stronger and surpass any relationship that has been on ABC. Rachel, CBS. Rachel, zing! Brendon, ABC is the Bachelor and Bachelorette. So I am happy and excited to be in our lives together, I hope that our keys never gets separated. I promise you will always be my one and true alliance, and I will never ever make any side alliances. Rachel, thank you.

Lawon, Can we have the rings big Jeff. Jeff gives the rings to Rachel and Brendon. Shelly takes them away and gives them to Lawon. Lawon, I have the alliance for the love of Brendon and Rachel. He gives them the rings. Lawon, Do you take Rachel to be your lawful wedded wife? Rachel, Brendon I do, wait. Someone, you have to repeat it. Brendon, I do? Brendon, do you take me to be your lawful Big Brother husband. Rachel, I do. Yea!

Lawon, now that the powers may be in the Big Brother love alliance of Rachel and Brendon. I now pronounce you husband and Big Brother wife. You may kiss. They all dance/skip funny down the aisle.

I hope they enjoyed themselves in the Big Brother house. I guess it entertained them.

They go inside and open the champagne. Jeff has to do the toast. They go back to the backyard for the toast. Jeff, May the wind always be at your back and the sunshine on your face. May the wings of destiny carry you along to dance among the stars. A line from one of his favorite movies.

Cruddy the elf speech, please make sure you take plenty of pictures in the honeymoon suite.

Rachel throws the bouquet. Nobody wants to catch the bouquet, so Jordan leans out to catch it. Brendon is going after the garter. Jeff catches the garter in his fedora. LOL They don’t have a camera. So Rachel told everyone they have to dress up again tomorrow when they have a camera.

Rachel and Brendon run out to the hammock. Then Rachel needs wine, on the way back to the house they decide to stop and have their first dance.

Daniele is already out of her dress. LOL Daniele and Kalia agree they took the high road for all this. I have to agree especially the way they have been treated this week.

Rachel and Brendon were supposed to get married in real life in September, but because of the show it has been postponed. They haven't decided on a new date yet.


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